I was expecting the latest Godzilla to be a reboot of the original, Gojira. Instead I got a "Godzilla versus" film. This one is Godzilla versus MUTOs, Massive Unidentified Terrestrial Objects.

The movie starts in the Philippines where a mining operation finds a large skeleton of something, but they unleash two MUTOs into the world. The first one finds its way to a Japanese nuclear power plant with Brian Cranston and Juliette Binoche as scientists worried about the seismic activity heading their way. The second one is stored in the US. These are not Godzilla. He seems to hang out in some far off land waiting for MUTOs to show up. I can't wait for the sequel to see "Monster Island," because I want to reference that classic Simpsons line: it's actually a peninsula.

The MUTOs destroy Japan then head to America destroying first Honolulu then San Francisco. Godzilla follows them in order to stop them. He's Nature's exterminator. He kicks ass and shoots radioactive breath. He stomps and stomps, and doesn't care for humans.

Neither does the movie. Humans and actors didn't matter. It was just about big kaiju. I wanted to see kaiju; I got kaiju once more. Except it wasn't so awesome. The action was there, but kaiju versus kaiju isn't as satisfying as kaiju versus giant robot.

The humans weren't so memorable. I couldn't care about them. And their issues: trying to get home, trying to justify their craziness, trying to reunite with loved ones. Eh. Just give me kaiju.

Godzilla is a summer movie. Will it be the biggest, baddest of them all? We'll have to find out. Here comes summer.

3 of 5 stars.

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