This was my big art project for last year -- a selfie a day. I'm not sure it worked out very well. Someone told me that it should've been in the same place every day. As you can see, I did it wherever and whenever. I missed days. I used cameras attached to computers from my iPhone to my iPad mini to my laptop. It was ridiculous.

You can see the whole thing on my Flickr album.

Labels: I am me, lame idea, pictures

New Year’s Resolutions are lame. You will break them by the January 2nd if not before. That being said I’m writing out my New Year’s Resolution in order to be transparent. How long will they last? It is up to me. I need to work on my perseverance.

Health

• Target weight 210. Stretch goal of less than 205. Today I’m about 230 wet. 210 is 20 pounds away. I have 12 months. That’s about a little over a pound a month. It can happen. It must happen because my pants are getting too tight.
• Lose 5 inches around the waist. What is it now? What constitutes the waist? I would like to lose my belly or decrease that by 5 inches. Anything to get me to fit in my pants.
• Lower my resting heart rate by 4 BPM. What’s it now? I will say 84 BPM. If I can get it to average under 80 BPM success!
• Lower my blood pressure targeting 120/85. What’s it now? I would say 125/92. Maybe it might be, but it needs to be less.

Exercise
In order to get healthy, I’m gonna have to get off my butt and do some exercise. I got an Apple Watch to help me track it, but I need better metrics.

• 150 miles on a bike. I haven’t ridden faithfully for 5 years. I’ve always wanted to get back to the feeling of joy as I pedaled by bike. Two hundred may be a bit too far. My rides around the block were usually 10 to 13 miles. The ride at the NCR trail to Sparks is 12 miles. The airport loop is about 12 miles, too. There’s gonna be a lot of bike riding if I actually get on the bike.
• 120 outdoor walks. That’s about 10 a month. I didn’t say the average, because it depends upon the weather. What is a walk? 15 minutes!
• 5 sessions a month on the rower. I’ve got it in the house. I’ve got to use it. What’s a session? 15 minutes! Hopefully, I don’t hurt my elbow doing this.

Professional Life

• Learn a new language and use it. Maybe use it to write an actual iOS app.
• Maybe a new job. Not a new position, but somewhere else. Is it possible to even change jobs at this age in this particular field?

Personal

• Blog more. Not just movie reviews or link of the days. Blog something meaningful. Start a series of posts on a topic. Blog about the bike rides. Something. Anything.  Target five meaningful posts a month.
• Cook more. Don’t eat out too much. Lessen my snack spending (lattes, donuts, ice cream) by 25%. Lessen my dining out by 25%. Currently, Quicken tells me I spend a total of $6700 on dining out of which $1400 is snacks.
• Read more books. Read literature a bit more. Maybe finish the novels on the nightstand. There are 3 or 4 I believe. Whatever needs to happen so I don’t stay on the computer all night.
• Japan. I really want to go there. I will. Tokyo for maybe a week. Really want to go there. Tokyo would a start.
• Study Japanese more. Maybe 30 minutes a night or an hour for 3 days a week.

Labels: get off your butt, I am me, resolute

I had some dizziness on Tuesday. I felt like I was tipping over. And then I was anxious. It blew over and I was fine.

I had some dizziness on Wednesday. I had 3 events. I was weak at the end of the day. I thought I was fine. I thought I was going to die. I went to the emergency room to see if I was dying.

I spent the night in the ER. Then I was admitted for observations for another day. I was at the hospital for the next day.

Turns out I have Type I Arnold-Chiari malformation. Yeah sounds scary. Not sure if I should be fine. Who knows. YOLO.

http://www.ninds.nih.gov/disorders/chiari/detail_chiari.htm

Labels: health is your wealth, I am me, lotd

Only for the week or maybe the month, but no facial hair is weird.

Labels: I am me

But not that much...

From the same wanker who brought us The Bell Curve. It's all non-sense. Each of the questions on the quiz makes tons of assumptions. You should try it. And have a good laugh.

Labels: I am me, wankers

Here's nendoroid number 40+, Erica Sendo from the Japanese eroge, Fortune Arterial. I think she's a vampire, but here she is having a cup of tea. I'm wishing Mugi-chan was serving us, but that nendoroid would have to come out later.

Labels: anime, I am me, I'm a fool, nendoroid

I need to revisit my 5 year plan. Get the fuck out of IniTech and go all Delicious Mac development.

But no.

I'm a pussy.

That's why I work at IniTech.

(I think I wrote this post 5 years ago) FML

Labels: Apple, get me out of here, get off your butt, I am me, I'm a fool, Macs, whining

If there was flickr in the 90s, I would've favorited this photo.

The funny thing about this photo is that it was taken on September 18, 1996. It's my birthday! Happy birthday, BrowserMetrics! You're 25!

Now take a look at who's helping me to celebrate. They are co-workers from Ruby's, fellow servers. For my last birthday, it was just my family. I can't believe that I had celebrated a birthday not with family. It's been a long time.

The other aspect of this photo is that the girl I was crushing hard on at the time is also there to celebrate it as well. That's why I'm ducking out of the picture. This can't be real. Someone pinch me. The problem though is that I was a drunk at the time. So it was hard to figure out what happened on this night.

When I pulled this photo off the floppy, I didn't know any of these facts. I had to search my memory for it. I had to look at the date on the files just to be sure that I had the right year. This time of my life is a drunken blur. I must've been having too good of a time to chronicle it. And yet I wish I had.

Currently, I like to chronicle my life with social media. Blogs, flickr, twitter are all contributing to making my memories indexable by google. Yet, these formative years of my twenties weren't and they make it a big, black hole. So I look at this photo, and smile as it'll help me recover them.

Here's how I think the night happened. Drinks at the Harryman House. More drinks at one of these guys' house. Passed out drunk. What a birthday! As I look back on it, I wish I wasn't a drunk and I had put the moves on that girl. Some things are still the same with me.

So what I have here is an artifact of funness, something which I've been missing these last few months. I've been in a funk. I just need to get my drunk on and just have a good time. Like that bastard in the photo.

Labels: 25, I am me, lyrics, nostalgia

Remember this? I had promised a few posts related to these pictures in which I look back to who I was back then. Before doing so I want to get into the technology of these pictures, because it struck me as funny as to how far computing has progressed. And it was in thinking of how old these photos were that made me realize that even though I am in these pictures that person is not anything like the me of today and neither is the technology.

You already know I pulled these pictures from a 3/4" floppy disk, but you don't know that they were formatted as a gif file. That's funny because the best way to store pictures onto storage media would be jpg. Why are they gifs? Who in their right mind would scan photos into gif files. What year is it again?! I remember when and where I got these photos scanned. It was a camera store in Hunt Valley by the Giant, and according to the time stamps of the files, they were created on Saturday, October 12, 1996. That's just about 14 years ago, when the Internet was barely walking, the floppy drive was the favorite removable storage media, Windows 95 was within its year of release, and you didn't own a scanner. Plus, cameras were still using film.

Look at it today, October 4, 2010. Our storage media contain 1000 times more floppy disks. The Internet is in its unruly teens. I don't care anymore about Windows 95, because OS X kicks its ass, and Apple still rulez. I have a scanner and could scan those analog film pictures on my own into jpg files if I wanted. And my camera is pure digital.

We change. So does technology. What happens when we try to go back? It becomes somewhat of a hassle because things may not be compatible anymore. All the trouble to update outdated things, is it worth it?

Labels: 25, I am me, lyrics, nostalgia

This summer I had purchased a 3/4" floppy drive. My motivation to go backwards in time was to find these photos. Little did I know was that I could've just brought the Win95 machine back to life and used it's floppy drive or barring that I could've resurrected the Powerbook 190 for the job. All I'm saying is that I went through plenty of hurdles to put these on my flickr photostream.

These pictures are inspiring me to write a couple of posts about them, about that time, about that person who I was. When I pulled them from the floppy, lots of thoughts and memories came flooding to my mind. I wanted to identify who was who, when was when, and what happened. Needless to say this reminiscing leeds me to think I may have a few tall tales to tell from these photos.

I think I may have a few posts coming...

Labels: 25, I am me, NewsRadio quote, nostalgia

It has to keep going...

... because it is should be interesting.

And I can't think of anything so far...

I started this post 20 minutes ago trying to figure out something to write about.

Write what you had on your mind.

What would that be? Girls? A girl?

But that's always on your mind.

Not all the time.

I also think about other stuff. Mainly other stuff, because thinking about girls gets you depressed.

Depressed?

Not really. But that is the way I played my cards.

You could never play right. Your 'tell' is just too obvious.

Right. You noticed. Now if only they could, too.

Yup.

Labels: fiction, I am me, NewsRadio quote, yup

Was browsing through the bookstore tonight. I know, right? A Friday night and your humble narrator was at the bookstore. It's my home away from home. I was just browsing the manga stacks picking up the second volume of Twin Spica, BrowserMetrics' current nice read, when I saw the book of books, Japanese Schoolgirl Confidential!! Yeah, I know, right? Of course I flipped through it.

Hentai! But that isn't the point of this post.

In the books, there was plenty of pictures of school girls in short, pleated skirts. Lots of Grade D zettai ryouiki. Hentai! But this isn't the point of this post.

I am a leg man. They're my favorite part of the female body.

What I noticed though from the book and what has been kind of making me sad is that Japanese girls have chubby legs. Their legs on average are not very shapely. That's a shame considering that their country loves the skirt and loves the bare thighs. It's a country that has coined a brilliant word for those bare thighs: zettai ryouiki -- "absolute territory." Think about that. A word to describe the flesh from the hem of the skirt to the top of the socks. Brilliant. Yet, their women have legs that don't inspire leg men. Even my favorite, Nozomi-chan, her legs are not very shapely, which makes me sad, because with such a cute face, yumm. Lots of cute, cute girls. Lots of short skirts. Not too much shapely legs.

Perhaps my definition of great legs is completely different. Perhaps I've got too high standards. No. I'm sure my standards are too high.

But I am a leg man. They're my favorite part of the female body. Make sure you have the legs to show a little skin. I'll love you forever.

Now, with that said, I'll be working on my girls in glasses post next.

Labels: I am me, mmm, so kawaii, zettai ryouiki

I'm in the hospital right now waiting for the operation. My operation is tomorrow, Monday, early in the morning. I get bored waiting for it to happen. Let me explain how much I have been waiting. First I had to wait to go to the hospital. By the way, I'm at the University of Maryland. Then when I got here, I had to wait at the admissions desk. Then I had some tests don on me. I hate needles. When they puncture your skin, it is sort of weird. It doesn't hurt, but when the needle is in the vein any sort of movement causes the weirdest setsation. After tests, I had to wait some more for my room to be ready (8-wets room 74). Right now I'm waiting for 9:0 when I (hopefully) fall asleep.

The operation, I hope, will be a success. I hope they don't have to shave my whole head. I would like to keep some hair on my head so Andrea can run her fingers through my hair. I love when she does that. It get me up. They're going to put some fiberglass type stuff to fill the depression. The surgeons are going to anchor the stuff to my skull with iron wires drilled o it. At 6:30 in the morning!! I have not woken up that early since early last school year.

I've seen this Star Trek about 20x's. It's pretty hilarious. Abraham Lincoln fighting. How Bogus. I can't believe he can kick-but.

I am going to have to learn how to write better.

Labels: I am me, journal, nostalgia

Illuminating love falls from the skies
To water the illusions in our eyes
All that we desire and all we fear
All our aspirations grow unclear

We feel endlessly
Beyond all gravity

Who are we? What we see? O, I can't comprehend
Who are we? What we see? Woah, I can't comprehend

Thievery Corporation, "All That We Perceive"

Labels: I am me, lyrics, qotd

Everything that's real and everything unrealized
All infinity starts falling from your eyes
We are fluid dreams, vivid memories
All uncertainty leads to eternity

All that we perceive in every mystery
Who are we? What we see? Oh, I can't comprehend
Who are we? What we see? Whoah, I can't comprehend

Thievery Corporation, "All That We Perceive"

Labels: I am me, lyrics, qotd

How do we think? What are emotions? What makes my personality different from yours? How is it that I am an individual with particular tastes, particular beliefs, and particular obsessions? Why are mine different than yours when you, like me, are flesh and blood, skin and bones, mind, body and heart?

The other day, my co-worker brought up the topic of OCD, obsessive compulsive disorder. She related a story of a friend who she thought had it. I thought it strange. She thought it strange, too. All I could come up with is the physical imbalance of chemicals in her friend's cranium causing a short circuit in the way this person thinks. This imbalance causes the friend to think obsessively on one thing even though they know it too be a curious way to behave. I found my self saying that it is inexplicable to understand what makes this imbalance of chemicals manifest itself as a thought to keep obsessing about a particular thing.

Pointing out the chemical imbalance is something my mom, a psychiatrist, would say. I don't think that is all there is too it.

Our body takes in nutrients: protein, electrolytes, amino acids, and uses it to make our bodies function properly. Not only our muscles, but our mind and nervous system of which the brain is the primary organ. We all get them. Our brains and body convert them in a similar fashion. Yet, we turn up as individual personalities. How does this happen? And is it a matter of the difference amongst us at the quantum level?

I'm sure scientists have been searching for the answer. I'm also sure that this is a philosophical question too.

We are all human, but we are all different.

Labels: I am me, NewsRadio quote

This is some old shit! Thanks to the Wyman for this video. Of course I saw this when you do a name search of me on google. This is some old shit!

The only question is where the big W? And what happened to Dennis Min?

Labels: boobtube, comraderie, I am me, your kung fu is good

Today, err tonight rather, is the longest night of the year. They call this winter solstice. From this day forward it will be nothing but brightening days and shorter nights. Imagine, spring is almost here!

I do not like spring. It is my least favorite season. Even the cold of winter beats it out. I like it less because of the fact the days are lengthening. As spring approaches, the quality of light during the day is brighter, but unlike the quality of light in the autumn, spring's is more happier. I do not like this brightness. I like the gloom of the autumn and the dark of winter. I would rather have it with not much light at all.

Also, around this time lots of holidays are centered around the longest night. It is such a coincedence that Christmas falls around the time of the winter solstice. As if the early christians adopted a pagan holiday for such a purpose. Hmm. What does yule stand for again? How about the chunnuka, festival of light? What a coincidence that it is a celebration of light in darkness! Weird that lots of cultures celebrate this day.

Labels: I am me, science fiend